![](https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8xG-wBK1OXIfnAUswiAayZywloOQIR_NnLIekLeZzl9VdaN94q7TXhTh7IEF720y17dIwR0Eu1E7uPC3MtxJfpBKVINqU85-FXVK5IsT5CFztT370k__Fs_pwLYuTyx9MHaCt46inn9QI/s400/2011-09-19+15.04.40.jpg)
Okay, for this entry, I'm just gonna blog about my thoughts about myself and what really bothers me. So if you are uninterested or what not, kindly do me a favour and move on. (:
Some of you might be wondering, why are my photos all with beanies or head cover. Let me tell you the truth. My hair scalp is heavily damaged from the hair products that I used to apply and it's thinning. After shaving my hair off, I think there's this patch that looks pretty bald. Yes I know, I look horrible. With a deep V on my forehead gosh.
Yes, I'm really concern about it, I've been trying to control my diet and hopefully that it recovers. Yes it's gonna take time I guess, but I know its recovering slowly. The reason I went for hair for hope was to give myself a chance to stop using hair spray/wax/gel etc.
Many people tell me that I'm vain, yes I know, I really am vain, I'm not gonna deny that fact. Idk, is being vain really such a bad thing? I'm just concern about myself and I'm really conscious about how people look at me, it really hurts to hear rude comments about me. Truth or not, it hurts..
When I go out with people, I'd always try to appear confident and optimistic, but deep down I know it's just a front that I put up. I don't want people to see me as someone who is a pessimist and stuck with inferiority complex. I naturally learn how to hide that fact. It's just part of me, Idk.
Yes, I am fat. Or I think I am. No matter what people say to me, I still think that I'm fat. I know it's whiny that I even complain that I'm fat. I should be doing something about it rather than always telling myself that I'm fat. So, I've started to take back my jogging and exercising routine, hoping that I will slim down eventually and become confident with my body.
I'm fully aware that my post might upset a few of you so I'm gonna apologise here in advance. Hope you don't get offended by whatever I've said. I know that in this world there are more than one truth and that my perspective might not be what you acknowledge. Maybe the way I think is really immature but please don't judge me base on what I've written.
I really enjoy talking with all sorts of people, to me it's broadening of my perspective. I want to know more!
Thank you to anyone who finished reading this entry. (:
-kaze